Talk about LUCK!

THIS HAS TO BE   THE FEEL-GOOD STORY OF THE YEAR !!!!!!
IF THIS DOES NOT SURELY TOUCH YOUR HEART ....  THEN YOU JUST DONT HAVE ONE .....
AN INCREDIBLE STORY OF INSPIRATION !!!!!   AND  WITH JUST A TOUCH OF LUCK... 
   

Can you believe it? 
This  guy wins $181 million in the lottery and then finds the love of his life just 2 days later. 
Talk about  LUCK! 

(download)

Thank you, DeWalt

A must have!!

Once in awhile something so totally cool comes out that even a guy who doesn't normally even know what he'd like for Father's Day or Christmas would immediately ask for it:


Thank you, DeWalt!!!

Att00001


New Nail Gun, made by DeWALT


It can drive a 16-D nail through a 2x4 at 200 yards.
This makes construction a breeze, you can sit in your lawn chair and build a fence.
Just get your wife to hold the fence boards in place while you sit back,
and relax and when she has the board in the right place, just fire away.
With the hundred round magazine, you can build the fence with a minimum of reloading. After a day of fence building with the new DeWalt Rapid fire nail gun, the wife will not ask you to build or fix anything else, probably, ever again.

Brilliant design for this new coin - must have been designed in Greece.

 

The  EU is to introduce  a new 10 Euro coin marking the 10th  Anniversary of the introduction of the Euro to the world financial markets.  
You will not be surprised to learn  that it has been officially announced by the  Productivity Commission that each coin will cost  12 Euros to produce.  

The  favoured design, as  selected by the committee of MEPs concerned, subject to formal ratification by the unelected  commission, is as below

 

New_eurocoin

My One day of employment


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After landing my new job as a Bunnings greeter - a goodfind for many retirees,  I lasted less than a day  ....... 
About two hours into my first day on the job a very  loud, unattractive, mean-acting woman walked into the store with her two kids, yelling obscenities at them all the way through the entrance. 
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As I had been instructed, I said,
 pleasantly, “Good morning and welcome to Bunnings.” 
I then said, “Nice children you have there.  Are they twins?” 

The ugly woman stopped yelling long enough to say, “Hell no, they ain't twins. The oldest one's 9, and the other one's 7. Why the hell would you think they're twins? Are you blind, or just stupid?” 

So I replied, “I'm neither blind nor stupid, Madam. I just couldn't believe someone shagged you twice....Have a good day and thank you for shopping at Bunnings”  

My  supervisor said I probably wasn't cut out for this line of  work

English - brilliant!

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby
English will be the official language of the European Union rather than the other possibility, German.

As part of the negotiations, the
British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would become known as 'Euro-English'. 

In the first year, 's' will replace the soft 'c'. Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard 'c' will be dropped in
favour of 'k'. This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter. 

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome 'ph' will be
replaced with 'f'. This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter. 

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. 

Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. 

Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent 'e' in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away. 

By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing 'th' with 'z' and 'w' with 'v'. 

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary 'o' kan be dropd from vords kontaining 'ou' and after ziz fifz yer, vevil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.

Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis
and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru. 

Und efter ze fifz yer,ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forstplas. 

If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl.