Cake or Bed

CAKE OR BED

A HUSBAND IS AT HOME WATCHING A FOOTBALL GAME WHEN HIS WIFE INTERRUPTS,

HONEY, COULD YOU FIX THE LIGHT IN THE HALLWAY?
IT'S BEEN FLICKERING FOR WEEKS NOW.

HE LOOKS AT HER AND SAYS ANGRILY, FIX THE LIGHTS NOW?
DOES IT LOOK LIKE I HAVE ENERGEX WRITTEN ON MY FOREHEAD? I DON'T THINK SO.

FINE,
THEN THE WIFE ASKS, WELL THEN, COULD YOU FIX THE FRIDGE DOOR?
IT WON'T CLOSE RIGHT

TO WHICH HE REPLIED, FIX THE FRIDGE DOOR? 

DOES IT LOOK LIKE I HAVE WESTINGHOUSE WRITTEN ON MY FOREHEAD?
I DON'T THINK SO

FINE, SHE SAYS THEN YOU COULD AT LEAST FIX THE STEPS TO THE FRONT DOOR? THEY ARE ABOUT TO BREAK

I'M NOT A CARPENTER AND I DON'T WANT TO FIX STEPS HE SAYS, DOES IT LOOK LIKE I HAVE BUNNINGS WRITTEN ON MY FOREHEAD?
I DON'T THINK SO I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF YOU. I'M GOING TO THE PUB!!!!

SO HE GOES TO THE PUB AND DRINKS FOR A COUPLE OF HOURS....................

HE STARTS TO FEEL GUILTY ABOUT HOW HE TREATED HIS WIFE, AND DECIDES TO GO HOME

AS HE WALKS INTO THE HOUSE HE NOTICES THAT THE STEPS ARE ALREADY FIXED.

AS HE ENTERS THE HOUSE , HE SEES THE HALL LIGHT IS WORKING

AS HE GOES TO GET A BEER, HE NOTICES THE FRIDGE DOOR IS FIXED.

HONEY, HE ASKS, HOW'D ALL THIS GET FIXED?
SHE SAID, WELL, WHEN YOU LEFT I SAT OUTSIDE AND CRIED

JUST THEN A NICE YOUNG MAN ASKED ME WHAT WAS WRONG, AND I TOLD HIM.

HE OFFERED TO DO ALL THE REPAIRS, AND ALL I HAD TO DO WAS EITHER GO TO BED WITH HIM OR BAKE A CAKE.

HE SAID, SO WHAT KIND OF CAKE DID YOU BAKE?

SHE REPLIED,
HELLOOOOO..
DO YOU SEE SARA LEE WRITTEN ON MY FOREHEAD?
I DON'T THINK SO!

Atlantis Hotel in Dubai - Wow!

 

 

 

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1. Water world ... the Atlantis Hotel in Dubai, one of the world's most anticipated hotels, finally opens its doors on September 24. Situated on 113 acres of the Palm Jumeirah, the hotel boasts over 1539 rooms.

 

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2. Water bed ... the Neptune and Poseidon Suites are exclusive to Atlantis, with both bedroom and bath views directly into the mesmerising underwater world of the Ambassador Lagoon. 

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3. Sea view ... the Ambassador Lagoon is a window into the wonders of the ocean, and the centre-piece of Atlantis, with over 250 species of fish and sea creatures. 

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4. Fish surprise ... keeping with he water theme, the Lost Chamber is a maze of underwater halls and tunnels under the Ambassador Lagoon with over 65,000 fish.

 

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5. See sea food ... Ossiano is home to a three-star Michelin chef, and offers gourmet seafood with views of the exotic marine life of the Ambassador Lagoon. 

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6. Pleased to meet you ... Dolphin Bay is a four-and-a-half hectare lush tropical setting where you get the chance to meet the colourful characters in their natural habitat.

 

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7. Big dipper ... Aquaventure is a 42-acre waterpark with the Zigguret Centerpiece that touts a 27.5m vertical drop. 

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8. Shark tank ... after the Ziggurat, you will emerge slowly through the lagoon at Shark Attack.

 

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9. All washed up ... the Rapids is a 2.3km path of tidal river with one metre waves though a lush tropical landscape. 

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10. Shark proof ... you can also experience the Shark Tank from the dry, and more comfortable, viewing chamber. 

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11. Bar view ... sip cocktails in the oceanic space of Barazura and enjoy views overlooking Palm Jumeirah. 

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12. Grand view ... the Grand Lobby makes a colourful first impression. 

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13. Bath time ... the spa experience includes two hours of spa treatments, your own private time in a jetted tub and access to both indoor and outdoor relaxation areas. 

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14. Spa service ... the Royal Spa Suite offers treatments designed to individual needs, and a spa menu delivered by private butler service.

 

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15. Grand designs ... each of the 1373 spacious guest rooms and 166 suites is designed with subtle oceanic and Arabic influences. 

  

   Below is the prices for One Week (3 Feb - 10 Feb 2009).  If anyone would like to donate so that I can go on a holiday, it would be greatly appreciated. 

  

  

Room Type

Tue

Wed

Thu

Fri

Sat

Sun

Mon

Total

 Atlantis Room

2,100.00

2,100.00

2,100.00

2,100.00

2,100.00

2,100.00

2,100.00

14,700.00

 Imperial Club Room

2,700.00

2,700.00

2,700.00

2,700.00

2,700.00

2,700.00

2,700.00

18,900.00

 Executive Suite

3,800.00

3,800.00

3,800.00

3,800.00

3,800.00

3,800.00

3,800.00

26,600.00

 Terrace Suite

4,750.00

4,750.00

4,750.00

4,750.00

4,750.00

4,750.00

4,750.00

33,250.00

 Regal Suite

5,700.00

5,700.00

5,700.00

5,700.00

5,700.00

5,700.00

5,700.00

39,900.00

 Executive Suite Club

4,600.00

4,600.00

4,600.00

4,600.00

4,600.00

4,600.00

4,600.00

32,200.00

 Terrace Suite Club

5,550.00

5,550.00

5,550.00

5,550.00

5,550.00

5,550.00

5,550.00

38,850.00

 Regal Suite Club

6,500.00

6,500.00

6,500.00

6,500.00

6,500.00

6,500.00

6,500.00

45,500.00